Simian Mobile Disco does an amazing song called "Audacity of Huge", and if you've ever been ready to clear a 20 foot kicker, take a 15 foot cliff drop, or just need something to pump you up in general, this is a good one. Fairly trans, disco, electronica but not too hard or guitar reliant for those times when you're not really feeling the mainstream. Anyways, this post wasn't specifically about the song, but a preface to the rest of the post was in order.
Ever notice how we tend to find what works? We'll buy the same brand of underwear, soda, car because they worked for us once, our taste buds, comfort, etc. were stimulated by whatever we purchased. We choose a job type like technology, services, sports, construction because we got into it at one point or another and decided it worked for us. Our relationships even have a tendency to do this, we mingle with certain people, we find what works for them, and we stay in it and in the way that we've found works for us. I've decided something after four years in a relationship where I constantly surpressed my voice, held in feelings, kept communication to a minimum because it was easier, and lied because I didn't want confrontation; I've decided that with my relationships I want that audacity to go huge! To me, this Audacity of Huge song, meant it was time to go big, it was time to have the audacity to go as big as I wanted. Well, now I'm ready to have the "Audacity of Huge" when it comes to my relationships, I'm going to be more open with people, let them know my feelings and not harbor resent. If I think you're a pain in the butt, I want to let it know, because it's not fair to keep it from you, and if I'm madly in love with you, I want to let you know that too rather than chopping myself off at mid-leg. I don't know why people do this to begin with, I guess they're afraid of the immediate let down of fighting with a partner, being rejected, losing their comfortable spot, but in the end doesn't it make things better? Wouldn't you rather share with your friends and loved ones, and have the fleeting moment where the result doesn't quite match, over the big catastrophe that will ensue later? Or begin building your relationship with your partner as soon as possible, rather than drag it out so long that when you finally muster up the courage, they've moved on? I would! I will! Hopefully you will too!